A couple days ago one of our beloved fish died. I entered the boys' playroom to discover this and tried to prepare myself to tell the boys. When I finally worked up the nerve to tell them, I received a precious reminder that I'm just a girl in a house full of boys.
Their response to the dead fish? "Awesome, he's floating upside down!" And, "Mom, can I pleeeeeease flush him down the toilet?" Sigh.
The next day they asked me if they could go fishing in their aquarium.
Which reminds me of quite a few other comments I've heard:
"Who is stronger, Hulk or the Thing?"
"Who would win in a battle between Namor and Thanos?"
Or Spider-Man and Abomination.
Or Thor and Captain America.
It goes on and on. Daily. Nightly at the dinner table. And my husband is right there in the mix. I just stare at my food and try to focus on something else.
I serve them oatmeal for breakfast and they giggle and say they are eating hot poop.
In fact, they like to talk about bodily functions so much that I have now instituted a rule that we only talk about bathroom things when we are in the bathroom. So the next time I heard them say something about poop I shouted, "Boys!" and I heard one say to the other "All, right, let's go in the bathroom and talk." Oops. Mom outsmarted. They play in there often now.
I take them to the park and overhear Jack say to a friend (whom he just met a moment before) "If you let me punch you, I can show you how strong I am."
We visit Bass Pro Shops for fun, just to look around. And it takes forever!
They ask me more questions, like "Which kind of throw up tastes the worst?" and "Do I have to wear clothes today?"
Jack chases lizards around to "pet" them and Parker wants to live in Ancient Egypt so he can use a bucket for a toilet.
When we eat, it's become a regular conversation (besides the super heroes) to discuss what animal we are eating. When I was a kid, that made me sad. It makes these little boys giggle!
They ask my husband constantly if they can smell his armpit. Seriously.
They also have learned that I have this weird problem with eyes. Eye issues and all things about eyes kind of freak me out. Since learning this they have gone from doing weird things with their eyes and tricking me into looking, to talking about things happening to eyes, to now just simply shouting "eyeball!" randomly throughout the day.
Oh, I'll probably never get used to being the only girl around. But, they do say things to make up for it sometimes.
Like, my favorite... "Mom, if you make your hair red, you'll look just like Black Widow!"
Ha! Yep, just like her. I wish.
Most of the time, I don't know what to do with these boys.
But I don't know what I'd do without them, either.